AFVOA Newletters of Year 2002

Page 82 of 84 to 20 years for simple cases to come to an end. The list of pending cases is over 25 million and gets longer by the day. 64. Shourie gives lists of scams. They make the headlines when unearthed. But when new ones are discovered, the old ones are forgotten. Chief ministers are jailed; they are returned to power to misrule again or run their state through their illiterate wives. If their governments are threatened, they expand their cabinets to accommodate the disgruntled without finding work to give them. 65. The list of wrongs done to Bharat Mata is endiess. Diwali is the right time to ponder over it. Either resolve to put matters right or drink tumblers full of bhang and go to sleep. I wish my readers a very happy Diwali. Celebrating old age 66. Old age does not call for celebration of any kind. Birthday parties for people in their 80s or 90s have a hollow ring. By then, those in whose honour they are held are unable to blow out more than three or four candles on their birthday cakes; unable to hear well-wishers singing ‘Happy Birthday’ without plugging in their hearing-aids; and unable to relish the taste of chocolate, cream and walnuts. 67. As people age, they decline into senility. The belief that old age brings wisdom is a myth: “When age is on, wit is out,” wrote Shakespeare. The old become slow and slovenly, begin to talk too much and become crashing bores. They make fools of themselves. Old age is pathetic; it is ugly. I know because I am an old man. However, photographers find the aged as photogenic as ancient monuments. 68. I was happy to get a copy of Ageless Mind & Spirit: Faces & Voices From the World of India’s Elderly , by Samar and Vijay Jodha (Neovision Publishers). I am in it. So are many who are younger than I am, and a few older than me. I felt strongly that Maharani Gayatri Devi, Rajmata of Jaipur, should not have been included. Though she is in her 80s, there is something ageless in her beauty that makes her immortal. 69. Cicero regarded old age as a blessing because it was devoic of sensual pleasures which he condemned as youth’s most vicious fault. Personally, I go along with the French comedian Maurice Chevalier who said: “When you hit 70, you eat better, you sleep sounder, you feel more alive than when you were 30. Obviously, it is healthier to have a woman on your mind than on your lap.” A little less 70. A gentleman hired an auto-rickshaw from New Delhi railway station to his residence in Govindpuri for Rs 70. After reaching his destination, the auto-rickshaw driver refused to go inside the narrow lane in which his passenger lived and said, “It is only a little distance, please walk down.” The gentleman paid him Rs 60 and replied: “I have given you only a little less.” (Contributed by Parimal Sarkar, New Delhi) Alcoholic initials 71. A man entered a Pakistani aircraft in a highly drunken state. He was arrested and was produced before a magistrate. “Why did you enter the aeroplane in such an intoxicated condition?” asked the magistrate. “I didn’t do anything wrong, M’Lord. I did exactly what your airline suggests – PIA – aur main pi ayaa ,” said the man innocently. (Contributed by R.S. Mathur, Delhi)